Ambitious?

Ever since I became a librarian, I think I've become ambitious. In the past, when i was an accountant, I didn't feel the same. It was just a job then. Now, I see my future (at least for now) ahead, as a career.

I'm not ambitious in the "competitive" way. It's more driven by passion for the holistic meaning of what I do or can do. I have visions of bigger plans, how big my work areas can be and what can be done...the big picture (well, right now is it more like mine?). I have passion for the profession, and the cultural aspect of it all. With passion, there's vision. My brain ticks and envisions "how much more can be done for this area", the future possibilities, the long run effect & results, or even the creation of something bigger than the current state. And these are really meaningful work that will benefit our society in the long run, benefit Singapore in the long run.

My ambitions are also driven by negative forces. The lack of power to carry out the vision, to put the meaning & passion into reality, to bring it across. It is also driven by disappointment, at how some management personnel don't seem to see the meaning of it all, have no passion at all (they don't seem to buy into the mission/vision that is set by the Board & holistic impact) and doing things for the sake of doing it only and approaching things in the wrong way or totally miss the point. This really demoralises those who are passionate, till they lose that passion and become "in the system" coz they are disillusioned and convinced that life won't change for the better.

I still recall the earlier days when I was really supportive & passionate about the importance of what I'm doing, of being a librarian, doing something that's benefitting the nation. Now, seeing management being not really in the library field and are not really interested/passionate nor buy into the mission and holistic vision, and in some cases incompetent, it's hard to keep "passionate" for long due to all these discouragement. I struggling real hard to keep the passion up and I hope I stand long.

Ambitious? In a way, but is more for the power to do the right & meaningful thing in & for the organisation, for the nation.

One Last Dance 茶舞

Yesterday, I went to watch One Last Dance (茶舞)， a show starring Francis Ng.
It's a rather interesting show, especially how it was directed/filmed.

You start off with a sequence of events that tells a story. Well, as you watch, you don't really find anything special. However, as you reach a certain point, which seems to be the end of the story for that sequence, it is revealed that actually the sequence of events is reversed which depicts the real story & you get another storyline of what's happening. And that's the "wow" part.

Just as it says, it's like a jigsaw puzzle & it is at that turning point that somehow, something went on the brain and everything becomes clear & falls nicely into place, and the show becomes different, not not special anymore.

Also, the theme song is hauntingly fantastic...called Broken Orange.

"Directing Asia" talk by Francis Ng 吴镇宇

Attended an event organised by NLB under their Directing Asia series - "Crime: The Dark Side of Asian Cinema, A Talk by Francis Ng".
Of course, the main attraction was Francis Ng. Fortunately I registered for the event, or else I wouldn't have gotten in!

It was very educational, as he focused on HK cinema/films rather than on his soon-to-screen movie One Last Dance.

He talked about how he was the "disobedient" actor who dared to not do what the director said, but followed his instincts as a professional actor, using his skills to display and draw audience into the show. He also mentioned of the seeming redundancy of creating specific "image" (形象设计) using "art directors"...he cracked a joke about how art directors were created to "ark lei ge" director...if you know Cantonese you will get his joke.

He also joked about why he chose the movie line rather than TV. He said that in the past, people always called TV personalities 艺人 (yi ren) but movie stars, 明星 (ming xing). So he wanted to be a star, that's why he made movies. Of course, now they are all also called 演员 (actors) so it's not so bad now.

Sticking to the topic discussed, he mentioned that everybody has a dark side. Only when you have the dark side, then one can see the good side (light). It is a comparative thing (对比).

Also, there was discussion about how crime in HK cinema has evolved through the years. Though the context is still about the same, the characters have become more complex; in the past, the bad & good guys were quite distinct, but now, the characters have dual (or more) personalities.

A comparison between western & Asian cinema were made, the differing style & how Hollywood has now looked to Asia for inspiration for filmmaking. Also talked about 暴力艺术 (artistic violence) in movies.

Someone from the audience asked about why HK films are mainly about gangsters and if there will be any new changes. He responded that why HK produces so many gangster & comedy films is the same reason why Hindi (Bollywood) films always have singing & dancing (which raised a lot of laughter)!...it is their characteristic, or else who will want to watch?!

Someone also asked if he will film a gangster film in Singapore. Well, I think this person didn't read up enough, as One Last Dance was filmed in Singapore! Anyway, Francis Ng answered his question by saying Singapore was a tad too "clean" to film a gangster flick. He gave some examples of the people who came for the audition who didn't really fit.

About his dream role, Francis said he would love to play an orchestra conductor coz he is fascinated with the expression through hands and that he doesn't know music. It is something different. He said his manager gave him a weird look and said something like hah? 亏本生意.

Someone also asked him if he were to direct/produce a gangster flick, how would he do it? He said he would focus on the woman behind the gangster chief. He said that sometimes, when you 得罪a man, it's ok, but when you 得罪a woman, haha...big trouble. I guess hell hath no fury than a woman scorned. He said a woman is quite powerful and a woman can have a few (powerful) men, using her special abilities to make them do things for her.

He ended with the talk of how the dark side doesn't only exist in 黑社会. Sometimes those in seemingly "light" organisations are even darker.

There were so many things covered that I can't recall all at once, but will add on once I remember. Waiting for my friend to send me the photos to post here.