Is blind dating a taboo subject or actually it's pretty normal these days as more working adults are finding less time to meet potential people and thus go for blind dates arranged by agencies? In the older times, blind dates were usually set up by parents or relatives, but it seemed to have become a thriving business. Maybe taboo is too strong a word, but you know what I mean. People don't really talk about it that openly right? (Maybe I'm wrong)
Then again, what kind of people are more suited to blind dates?
Personally, I'm not really sure if it will work that well for me. I'm very reserved and cautious, so a blind date will probably see me behaving that way. I take some time to warm up to people, if they are worth warming up to. Well, it may be better than in a big social event, but it's kinda awkward isn't it?
If one party doesn't really feel anything during the 1st date, and the other person initiates a 2nd outing, should the person go? Being a traditional/conservative girl, I assume the girl waits for the guy to initiate. Theoretically, there's no harm in giving it a second go, after all, it's only a 2nd meetup, and something may or may not come out if it. If really on the 2nd meet there's no chemistry or sustainable shared interests (I would say priority areas), then it'll just be back to square one.
I wonder what's the success rate.
And how do guys actually decide whether they might want to meet the girl again? Maybe my guy friends can shed some light on this.
9 years ago
I'm open to blind dates! Provided tt I have some "bckgrd info" of the guy first. I think blind dates r gd if u wanna cut straight to the pt of Really Knowing someone. We know tt's impossible in a grp cos it's usually touch n go...
ReplyDeleteMaybe u like grp outings better?
I think a guy would wanna see the girl again when:
1. He feels gd abt the 1st date n thinks there r better ones to come heehee
2. He wants to know more abt the gurl
B
actually, group outings are worse for me I think. I'm very reserved with strangers, so I sort of "fade into the background". So those 1-time events are really useless.
ReplyDeleteHmm...but what makes the guy feel good about the 1st date?
Interesting post! I only just saw it today. Let me share my thoughts:
ReplyDeleteI think "blind dates" might still be a little bit taboo these days, although I think more and more people are starting to accept it as mainstream due to the fact that there are so many busy professionals in S'pore who are single cos they have very little time and opportunity to get to know potential partners.
Personally, I would shy away from blind-dates/speed-dating or what have you, cos I just don't think it will work for me. It's not something I would like to explore. I don't like the feeling of having to go through it.
"What kind of people are more suited to blind dates?"
Well, I think you have to be very open-minded if you were to go on blind dates. You have to tell yourself that anything might happen - you might meet some great people, you might meet no one great at all, you might meet someone whom you think is great but he might turn out to be not-so-great, you might meet someone who at first seems not-so-great but turns out great later, etc.
There will be all kinds of possibilities so you have to be prepared for that. And don't have too high expectations (or any expectations, for that matter). It's hard, but I guess it's the best way.
If you hope for the other "blind daters" to open up, you also have to be willing to open up yourself. If no one is willing to give anything away, then there will probably be not much headway made at all.
"If one party doesn't really feel anything during the 1st date, and the other person initiates a 2nd outing, should the person go?"
Personally, my answer would be "NO". If you don't feel that there is any chance at all that you want to take things further, then I would suggest you say "NO" so as not to lead the other person on. I think a "YES" to a 2nd date is a signal to the other party that you are interested to take things further, or that you are at least open to the idea of taking things further.
"And how do guys actually decide whether they might want to meet the girl again? Maybe my guy friends can shed some light on this."
Well, it's simple isn't it? If the guy had any interest in the girl, he would definitely ask to meet up again. Based on the 1st meeting, the guy will have to evaluate and see if there was anything about the girl that attracted him, or at least piqued his interest a bit.
If he feels that there is something worth exploring/pursuing, he will definitely push for a 2nd date. If not, then he will probably not.
Also, the guy will have to ask himself if he sees any possibility of a potential future with the girl. If he can't possibly see himself being with the girl, then of course he will not want to take things further.
just curious if guys have any common things they look out for.
ReplyDeleteCommon things...hmm...I think it's very hard to say. I really think that it will be different for everyone, just like every girl looks out for different things also. Some girls look out for confidence, or sense of humour, or honesty, or sincerity, or sweetness, or wealth, or looks, or whatever.
ReplyDeletePersonally I would look out for whether there is "chemistry" between us. As in, whether we can sustain a meaningful conversation together, and whether we have the right "frequency". And also if she is able to be comfortable and open with me.
In conclusion, there is definitely no common thing that guys look out for, in my opinion. To each his own.
i see...i thought maybe there would be some things that most guys look out for, like what girls might look out for like height, demeanor, etc. Although I must admit that sometimes, in the end these things might not matter as much as what you say "chemistry". It affects the 1st impression though.
ReplyDeleteOne might meet someone who fits all the "desirable traits" but if there's no chemistry, then it's a goner.
Oh, if you're referring to first impressions, then of course looks will be an advantage.
ReplyDeleteEven girls inevitably get attracted to tall and handsome guys...what more guys, being visual creatures! Guys would obviously be more attracted and interested in girls who are attractive (although what exactly constitutes "attractive" looks is very subjective indeed). One guy may feel that a girl is attractive, another guy may completely disagree.
Personally I will try not to let looks cloud my judgement, as impossible as it sounds. I always try to evaluate a person from the inside. But of course, if it's someone whose looks I like as well, then it's a bonus.
well, aren't blind dates usually about 1st impressions? If not both parties won't want to see each other again right?
ReplyDeleteNot just looks lah. Sometimes through the conversation or demeanor, you kind of form an impression too.